30 Nov, 2015
Are all the orphans and children deprived of their parents, want to go into the family?

Oksana Sklyar, the deputy director of the Center of the help to children “The Home of happy children” answers important questions.

“The desire of the child to get to a family depends on many factors. The first and most important is an acceptance by the child of that fact that her native parents the understanding and understanding by the child of own social situation deprived of the parental rights. The child accurately has to understand, what happened to his parents why they can’t bring up him, what role they will carry out in further life of the child.

If the child emotionally endured a gap with biological parents, and for each child it validly the tragedy, then we can say that such child will be able to accept in the heart of new people over time.

The following factor is formation in representations of the child a positive image of future family and family relationship. As a rule, children which parents deprived of the parental rights, have the distorted idea that such a family, what functions in it are carried out by parents, and what children as in a family her members interact, they have rights and duties “Obligations for the relation to each other. Only when the child understands that such a family and what there his place, he is ready to join in the new relations.

One of important criteria of readiness of the child for the device in family forms of education is stability of its psychoemotional state as the child feels as conducts, is able to express the feelings and thoughts, can trust another. If the child is in a relative stable state, it is possible to claim that he is capable to creation of the new relations with adults, is ready to trust in them and to accept in the heart.

Before a meeting of potential parents and children a large number of the experts making selection works train parents for a meeting with the child, and with a high probability can predict development of a situation and the child’s relations with the adult. In our experience there were no situations when children didn’t want to go to a new family as we determine the level of readiness of the child for the device in a family form, whether define these potential parents will be able to satisfy needs of this child, whether there are at them common interests, the vital rhythm, etc. is similar at them. It as puzzles which have to meet and create one general picture.

Of course, each child has the right for education in a family, and we try to provide this right. Along with it we have to protect interests of the child, and provide him education in such family which most of all suits it.”